Readers??? Not in this Oz!!


Vanity…………………………………

We all have it to some degree.

Some of us a little more than others (as my inner Diva stands in her red stilettos with her hands on her hips).

Today I visited my eye doctor for my annual eye exam.

I wear contacts. (Vanity:101)

I’ve gone to the same clinic for years.  This year there’s a new doctor………..

A cute young doctor (my inner Diva is paying attention).

We begin the exam in the usual way………he hands me the little plastic paddle………

“Cover your left eye and read the smallest line you can see.”

I cover my left eye………..

I’m blind as a freakin’ bat in my right eye!!!

“Well…….the second line, maybe the third……..” (my inner Diva is hiding)

“That’s alright, we’ll fix that, now cover your right eye.”

I can at least see the second to last line with my left eye…..thank goodness!!

We finish up the exam…..

“Doesn’t look like much has changed over the year.  Are your contacts still working for you?”

“Oh yes, I wear them ’til they feel like grit then I throw them out.”  I say with a little laugh.

He turns on his little stool; writes something in my chart and asks……..

“How are the readers working for you?  Are you using 1.50 or 1.75 strength?”

crickets…………………….

(my inner Diva jumps out of hiding and whispers in my ear, “We don’t do readers in Oz!!” “I know, I know!” I assure her.  I got this!!

“Um……no.”

He turns to face me on his little stool……..

“No?”

“Maybe…….”

“Sometimes……….but only 1.25 strength.”

He turns back around on his little stool……..

“Uh huh………how do you read?”

WHAT????  No he didn’t!!!!!  (my inner Diva is pouting now)

“Well…….I have to hold it out a little, but……..it’s ok.”

“Uh huh……..you might want to increase the strength to 1.50 or even 1.75.”

(my inner Diva turns up her nose…….)

“Well, maybe………I got this.”  I tell him as he chuckles.

It’s hard to hold my little spiral notebook far enough out to read and write at the same time.  So I sit and write this as I wear my 1.25 strength readers (I could really use the 1.50 strength……..damn it!!).  

I’m not ready to wear them out in public, so I plot with myself………..how will I read a menu one day?

I decided, I think I’m charming enough that maybe I could get my date to read it to me, or the waiter, or the folks at the next table……….or just order a plain salad and be done with it!!!

No menu or readers needed!!! (my inner Diva shakes her head yes).

Age and vanity are not a good mix…………..not for the Diva in this Oz. 🙂

But I got this………….

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Austin
    Oct 21, 2013 @ 22:37:39

    Glasses are cool. I should know… 😉

    Like

    Reply

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